Sports weekend

Friday once again - time flies when you're on the bench (consulting term). A big, big, big weekend of sports awaits us. Without further ado:

Baseball

While this year's match-up holds nowhere near the allure of last year's (at least for me), it's sorta fun to see Houston finally make it to the big show. I really don't know where the conventional wisdom is on this, but I think you've got to like the Astros pitching vs the White Sox pitching. Come on, Clemens, Pettitte, Oswalt, and Backe as your announced starters? That's pretty heavy. The White Sox foursome is good, but I think the edge goes to Houston. Go Disastros!

College football

Texas Tech @ Texas - The game of the year in the downtrodden Big 12, this might be one of the great shootouts of all time. However, Texas does have the number 3 defense in the country. I don't care how great your scheme is, if your QB is running for his life, throwing the ball 70 times (as Tech is wont to do) is a recipe for disaster. If the Texas defense asserts itself early, and Vince and Co. can put up a TD or two in the first quarter, this may turn ugly for the Red Raiders. A Longhorn blowout of Biblical proportions is what it says here.

Arkansas @ Georgia - Runner up for Redneck Game of the Week. The Razorbacks will be pork rinds by halftime.

A&M at K State - I'm still a Coach Fran fan, but A&M just isn't very good this year. K State got absolutely torched by Texas Tech last week and should be pissed enough to take A&M to the woodshed. A long drive for nothing for the Ags, I fear.

USC @ Washington - I think the Trojans have had their test. UCLA is the only thing standing between them and the Rose Bowl, and they're not all that much of a roadblock. Pete Carroll got what he wanted out of Notre Dame - a win but a wake-up call for his team. Look out, Huskies.

Tennessee @ Alabama - The much-anticipated Redneck Game of the Week. Rabbit-ear antennas all over the South will be twisted and turned, trying to pull this one in with a minimum of static. A word to the wise, Jim Bob - mount the TV aerial on the '86 Dodge pickup you've got on blocks in the front yard. Try propping it up with the empty cans from Friday night's Manwiches.

Navy @ Rice or Army @ Akron - The service academies have bigger things on their minds than football these days.

Auburn @ LSU - Another classic redneck matchup. I could never figure out if Auburn's mascot was a Tiger or a War Eagle. Can someone clear that up for me? Thanks.

Boston University vs. the immortal soul of Blaine Applegate - I heard Blaine is doing TV sports in upstate NY. That sounds perfect. Either that or selling insurance in Ames IA. You gotta respect a guy who had Carolyn Bessette before JFK Jr.

On to the pros

Seabags @ Cowboys - I will never bet on the NFL again in my life. The Cowboys SHOULD win this, right? This is the third week in a row they're facing the top offense in the NFL. The previous two (Philadelphia and NYG) are no longer tops because of the Cowboy defense. However, you can never tell in today's NFL.

Packers @ Minnesota - My God, the Vikings are bad. A tip to those guys - you can get away with acting like a bunch of thugs only if you win. The Cowboys were GOOD when they pulled all their crap. Learn from that.

Colts @ Texans - Houstonians are thankful that they have another local team to cheer for. If you're the new coach of the Texans (no way Dom Capers keeps that job), do you give up on David Carr?

Jets @ Atlanta - How did the Jets make it onto MNF? Atlanta should take them apart. Sorry, Ace. Go draft Matt Leinart and talk to me next year.

SF @ Washington - San Fran is terrible, but the Redskins have more choke in them than Alex Rodriguez. Don't be surprised to see SF roll big-time here.

Denver @ NYG - Word is that the Giants will shake off the malaise the Cowboys put on them last week. A good test, but I like NYG in a squeaker.

Pats vs Injured Reserve - Always a close match-up, it looks like IR has taken the upper hand lately. However, the return of Tedy Bruschi's bleeding brain may tip the scales back in favor of the champs.

Go (insert your team here)!