We did Top 5 Hottest Women of All Time recently, and I got some good feedback on it. Also, surprisingly, my wife didn’t chew me out for it.
So, since there seems to be interest from some quarters, and disinterest from others, let’s continue in that vein.
There’s a phenomenon out there that I think we’ve all noticed, and it can’t be ignored. This phenomenon is known as the Single-Movie Miracle. The Single-Movie Miracle occurs when a woman who is usually not-that-great to semi-hot looks so fabulous in one movie that you have to sit up and take notice.
A good example of the Single-Movie Miracle is Kate Winslet in Titanic. Normally, Kate Winslet is a not-so-great. But she was smoking hot in Titanic, and not just the nude scenes either. She looked great throughout.
I’m sure it’s a combination of director, cinematographer, wardrobe supervisor, and make-up supervisor (and, of course, the actress herself) that results in the Single-Movie Miracle. There really should be an Oscar in this category; it could be given to all involved collectively, sort of like Best Picture.
Whatever. On with the list (and, yes, I cheated again):
5. (tie) Ingrid Bergman in Casablanca
The triumph of black and white film and exquisite lighting. You can understand why Rick would throw it all away for her, and you realize the sacrifice he makes by sending her w/ Lazlo. Bergman was the perfect woman for the best film ever made.
5. (tie) Ashley Judd in Heat (and, I’ve heard, A Time to Kill, which I didn’t see)
Oh, what might have been. Ashley Judd was at the height of her hotness in Heat. If only she’d made some better career choices since then. Ah well. Again, it was easy to see how much Chris (Val Kilmer) was giving up when he turned his back.
4. Salma Hayek in Desperado
Sort of a silly film, but my God. Carolina is the embodiment of Latina hotness. Talk about the best thing going in a crappy, one-horse border town. I’d have braved the gauntlet of Bucho’s men as well.
3. Sophie Marceau in Braveheart
It was amazing how good the Princess Isabella looked in an age when no one bathed. Well, William Wallace probably didn’t look much like Mel Gibson either. Who cares. Maybe the best-looking couple ever on screen (not mere hyperbole – I mean, look at them).
2. Jennifer Garner in Elektra
If you’re into the kind of chick who can kick you’re a**, this is the movie and the actress for you. I have no idea what the plot of this bowser was about, and I don’t care. Jennifer Garner should hire the cinematographer from this film to do her home movies. She’s pure greatness on her own, but she is lit and photographed so well in Elektra that I’m willing to fight through a completely nonsensical plot and all kinds of ridiculous special effects just to look at her for 90 minutes.
1. Diane Lane in Unfaithful
I have been a Diane Lane fan since she was 19 years old and co-starring in Streets of Fire (10 bonus points if you can name anyone else in that one, but it’s better than you may remember). Through Lonesome Dove, Judge Dredd (oh dear), and The Perfect Storm, I always thought she was WONDERFUL. But she topped herself in Unfaithful. Forget that the plot is truly disturbing for any married guy (I mean, she goes from her seeming idyllic marriage to Richard Gere for God’s sake, to the arms of Olivier Martinez in no time and for no apparent reason, but she sells it). Forget that the last quarter of the film doesn’t live up to the rest of it. Forget it all. Just remember those smoking hot sex scenes. Remember Diane Lane completely believable as a woman besotted with passion. And remember the single greatest example of the Single-Movie Miracle. Zowie.
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