Not much really drives me nuts, but…

Now that the NFL has returned (and, with it, the much-anticipated CIT weekly college and pro football picks), I have been subjected to the two words in the English language which make me the craziest:

Da. Boyz.

This artificial nickname for the Dallas Cowboys, a joint by-product of an early 90s Saturday Night Live bit the white man’s need to sound “street”, raises my blood pressure instantly. Its like a red cape to a bull. When I hear it or read it, my teeth gnash of their own volition.

Dallas is really a terrible sports town. It’s the home of the front-runner, the band-wagoner, and the knee-jerk over-reactor. Sudden expertism and sports obliviousness run rampant. Everyone from the 20 year old receptionist at your dentist to the guy changing your oil to your neighbor Bob has a theory on why the Cowboy offense grinds to a halt in the red zone, and an opinion about who should be the weak-side linebacker in the nickel.

I have, over the course of the past 15 years or so, gone from Cowboy fan to Cowboy hater, back to fan, and now find myself mostly disinterested. I enjoy Sundays as much as the next guy, but the during-the-week knee-jerking, and hot sports opinions from the great sports-unwashed absolutely drain my will to live.

What set me off on this mini-rant? I just got an invitation to a game-watching party (INSTANT red flag – do any real sports fans go to “watching parties”?) to view “Da Boyz vs the Deadskins” on Sunday.

My options after receiving the email: Slip into a six-month coma, or go rail on the Internet. So here I am. Thanks for listening!

F1 in Melbourne: Ferrari does what they need to

The Australian Grand Prix in Melbourne is in the books, with Button winning outright in the McLaren, Kubica taking second in the Renault, and Massa and Alonso coming in third and fourth in the Ferraris.

After two weeks, most everything is right in the F1 universe, as Ferrari sits atop the constructors’ list, and Alonso and Massa top the drivers’ list.

I had been under the impression McLaren was considered somewhat behind the others in terms of adapting to the new rules and restrictions. Maybe, as Hamilton ended in 6th after the only 2-stop strategy amongst those in the points. However, Button’s win seems to indicate McLaren are well on their way to catching the others, if they were ever, in fact, behind.

Vettel held the lead until a late brake failure and resulting crash, continuing the two-race trend of lots of speed from the Red Bull, but questionable reliability.

And Schumi did the square root of nothing, coming in 10th and only deserving a mention because, well, he’s Michael frickin’ Schumacher, isn’t he?

Off we go to Malaysia in two weeks for more happy fun good times.

Ferrari starts well

The Bahrain GP is in the books, and Ferrari is off to a good start. Alonso won and Massa took second, and it doesn't get any better than that after one race.

A few things to mention:

1. Vettel in the Red Bull seemed to be the class of the field until a mechanical problem relegated him to fourth. Early in the race, no one seemed able to stay with him. Reliability has been a problem for Red Bull in the past. It seems if they can get past it, they are a team to be reckoned with.

2. Hamilton took 3rd in the McLaren, which was better than expected. You have to figure the McLaren guys are going to figure the new rules out sooner rather than later. I would have preferred they got off to a slower start, but it's silly to think they aren't going to be in the thick of the championship run.

3. Schumi did OK in his first race in 3 years (has it really been that long?), placing 7th. However, he was the slower of the Mercedes, finishing behind teammate Nico Rosberg and having his hands full holding off Button in the second (or is it first - he is the reigning champ) McLaren.

If your wardrobe contains some red, and mine has for a long time, you have to like how thing stand after one. Bring on Melbourne!

The return of F1

This weekend's Bahrain Grand Prix represents the beginning of a new age in Formula One, and the return of the world's fastest sport to these virtual pages.

The retirement of Schmacher, the rise of Hamilton, the ascendancy of Ross Brawn, and the mediocre showing by the boys from the Scuderia have all sapped my interest over the past few years. But now, Schumi is back, even if it is in a Mercedes, enormous rule changes make the outcome of any race a study in unpredictability, at least at this point, and Massa is back in red. So, what's not to like?

I don't pretend to be any sort of expert on F1, but I have been somewhat more than a casual fan for 30 years now. I look forward to this season as I have for no other in recent memory.

Don't expect up-to-the-minute news from the circus here, but do expect a few tune-ins, some commentary, and some unabashed tifosi-like banner waving.

Let's go!

Does BU need football?

As readers of this blog may know, my alma mater, Boston University, killed it's D1-AA football program in 1997. BU had about zero football tradition, and games at Nickerson Field were sparsely attended at best. However, I do have fond memories of fall Saturdays, the mighty Terriers taking the field against arch-rivals like UNH and Maine. Good times.

Brian Roach, in today's Freep, attempts to make the point that a dominant hockey program makes up for the absence of a mediocre football program. He reminds us of BU's multiple National Championships, 2009 being the most recent, bitter rivalry with that other school right out the B branch of the Green Line, and Beanpot triumphs. He doesn't mention, but could have, the semi-household names like Eruzione and Craig, Drury and Tkachuk, and, of course, Jack Parker.

Well, I'm not so sure. I have some great Beanpot memories, sure. One of the great sports moments of my life occurred at the Beanpot. I some really good times at Brown Arena (the Rathole On Babcock St). Scott Shaunessy was sorta fun to drink with at Father's Too on Beacon Street. I mean, it was nice being around a superior hockey program, no doubt.

But college hockey is a fringe sport. It's not even on the same map as college football or college basketball. It's lumped in with other third-tier sports like baseball, soccer, swimming, etc. All very worthwhile pursuits, don't get me wrong. But they just aren't the same as the biggies.

I have NOTHING in my experience to rival Game Day in Austin, or the atmosphere of Cameron Indoor or the Dean Dome. I've never been in an arena with the hoisted jerseys of Walton and Kareem, or where there are 100,000 people wearing maize and blue.

Now, of course, that's not to say BU could ever achieve that sort of success in the big sports. BU football was a very average 1-AA program. There was no history or tradition. The most spectacular players to ever roll thru Nickerson, guys like Jim Jensen and Bill Brooks, wound up with very solid, but unspectacular, NFL careers. A guy like Paul Lewis, who set every rushing record the school has, couldn't catch on with the Patriots as a free agent when the Patriots were terrible.

Hockey is all well and good. And it is nice to be able to say "I went to BU, home of the hockey National Champions of 2009". And it's probably better to have a dominant hockey team than it is to have a spare football team.

That was a long rant for not much payoff. I guess the moral of the story is its better to be really good at something sorta spare than it is to be really spare at something sorta good.

It probably also pays to not do too many stream-of-thought blog posts late at night!

Tiger giggle

I don't remember him being presented with THIS trophy, but perhaps I wasn't looking closely enough.

Olympic time again

It’s that time once again, when we stop down for a couple weeks of rapt viewing of otherwise-obscure sports, passionate debating about the relative merits of athleticism and artistry, and wistful musing regarding the debauchery going on within the Athlete’s Village even as I type this.

Yep, it’s the Olympics again, my preferred Winter version, this year taking place in a region I have known but fear I will not know, at least not the same way, again.

Is that last part cryptic? Too bad. I know what I meant.

At any rate, I do enjoy an evening of watching slightly insane humans hurtling down mountains on waxed carbon fiber, right on the very edge of catastrophe as they try to squeeze a few more meters per second out, a few less clock nano-ticks elapsed during the run. Its even more entertaining being able to say I was there, I rode that lift, skied that run, walked those streets, saw an event there, etc. Maybe even seeing a familiar face in the crowd, glimpsed in the sea of humanity in Gastown or Richmond, etc.

And the day-to-primetime handoff from the greatness of Al Michaels to the greatness of Bob Costas, Dan Patrick in a silly hat, Scott Hamilton’s emphatic “She NAILS it!”, all the hallmarks of Olympic TV.

I do so enjoy this.

Stories to watch? Heck, I don’t know. Hockey is fun, but not as much fun as when it was college boys against the roid-monsters of Red Army. Bode Miller has turned in too many disappointments in past opportunities to get excited about now. Lindsey Vonn sure is nice to look at, and seems to have a legitimate shot at a number of races. But I don’t see anything that’s truly must-see TV.

And it’s hard to keep cynicism at bay when talking about the kind of money present in modern Olympics. You need only get a snoot-full of the spin being spun about the death on the luge track to OD on fake hand-wringing and contrived tribute.

But, despite the lack of pre-packaged stories and the hypocrisy of modern sports-entertainment, I’m still glued. It’s a chance to see true greatness – how many kids in the world have the Olympics as their goal, and how many make it? And of those who make it, how many excel?

Yes, I love the Olympics, and NBC loves me.

Time lapse - NBA All-Star Game at the Death Star

Here, in two minutes of time-lapse video, is how the Mavs, Cowboys, and the NBA got the Death Star set and filled for the NBA All-Star Game last night.

Fascinating...

Good stuff ahead for the Rangers?

One of our favorite Dallas sports bloggers, the great Richie Whitt, keeper of the Soon-To-Be-Great Sportatorium over at the Observer (and the links list over there on the left), posits that there is a whole lot to look forward to in Rangers baseball, both in the short and longer terms.

Why, you ask?

Because, retorts RW, new Rangers’ owner Chuck Greenberg reminds him a heck of a lot of a certain other casually dressed Pittsburghian (Pittsburgher?) who took over a moribund Dallas sports franchise and turned it into a winner seemingly overnight.

Yep, Richie sees a lot of Mark Cuban in this guy.

This is, perhaps, too lofty a dream for long-suffering Ranger fans. Its too much for me to buy into sight-unseen. But, you know, what if…?

The State of Jewish Boxing Today

From The Ring Magazine

http://www.ringtv.com/blog/1261/jewish_fighters_foreman_and_salita_revive_an_old_tradition/

Stay sportsy, my friends

Oh so much to talk about here in Sportsville. I have been neglectful. But no more. Onward!


Rangers

Our formerly-red-shoed Rangers have done the near-impossible this season. They have kept us entertained past the start of the regular NFL season. This has never, to my thinking, happened before.

So much to be excited about regarding this team! Young pitchers who throw hard as hell, and who seem to know how to pitch as well. Young position players who can play their positions, hit reasonably well, run the bases (some blazingly fast). A nice mix of veterans to provide some wisdom.

And, at the head of it all, the Old-Skool Brother, Ron Washington.

Can it be? It's late Sept and I really should be back in school. Er, no. Not what I meant. It's late Sept and and we are still waxing rhapsodic about the Texas Rangers? We are. This has been the most entertaining baseball season I have experienced since the Red Sox of 1986.

Thank you, Nolan Ryan, Jon Daniels, and the rest. If Big Dumb Tom can sell the team to someone with some dough, next year may be even better.


University of Texas football

I've got the same feeling I had at the start of the season in 2005. Remember, I didn't start to get totally on board until after the Ohio State game that year. This year's schedule holds no similar out-of-conference test, so it will be Oct 17th's annual showdown with Oklahoma before I start to mention the "C" word (not THAT "C" word, you pervert) around here. But the cards seem to be falling into the right places, don't they?

By the way, did you see McCoy complete that pass to Shipley aboard a boat going 45 mph on the telecast this past weekend? Whoever thought that little stunt up needs to be keelhauled. Have you ever tried to stand in a small boat at speed? It ain't easy, and I thought it would not have taken much to knock Shipley right over the side. Maybe he was strapped in or something, but, man, I cringed!

At any rate, this season is off to a good start. That's all I'm saying right now.


Cowboys

Um, oh dear. Uh-oh? Maybe? I dunno.

I missed the opener against Tampa Bay, but it seems like it was a good one. However, I think we're seeing Tampa Bay is one of the worst teams in the league.

The Giants are clearly one of the best, and the Cowboys did seem to have the upper hand throughout the game. But...

But what's up with this Wade Phillips defense? There has been minimal pressure, even when they bring six guys. What happened to the swarming, scary-ass defense we saw at times down the stretch last year? Were Greg Ellis and Kevin Burnett really that important? I will certainly go on record as saying Kevin Burnett is a MUCH more attractive option than Bobby Carpenter. How is that guy still on this team?

The Cowboy defense looked a lot like it did in the doldrums of the Pear-Shaped Football Genius' tenure - unable to make a stop, unable to make tackles, and unable to get off the field when it really matters.

But what's up with Romo? Did he just have a one-game brain fart? Or his inconsistency becoming a consistent? It's feast or famine with this guy - he doesn't have many so-so games. And history is beginning to suggest the bigger the stage, the more likely he's going to toss out a clunker. When do we call it a trend?

The running game looks to be, potentially, something serious. Barber is hurt already, which isn't good. But it seems mild, and I thought the Cowboys could have had 300 yards plus if they had just kept running it.

The new kickoff guy seems to have worked out. The last time a Cowboy reached the end zone off a tee, he was holding a 1-iron, so it was good to see a few kickoffs get into the neighborhood. Still, a punter and two kickers? Wouldn't you really rather have another left tackle on the roster?

And let's talk for just a moment about the colossal, shiny Cowboys Stadium in Arlington, shall we? I absolutely LOVE The Ticket's nickname for it: The Death Star. I hope it sticks. It's perfect. In a world turning more Idiocracy by the minute, the Death Star only speeds us on our way to a Costco world. Sure, its a showplace. Sure, its going to get TONS of positive press. But do we really need 100,000 people crammed into a stadium to watch a football game on the world's largest TV screen? Personally, I am embarrassed by the place. It's too much for me. And it's in Arlington.

That last bit did sound a bit good-old-days-ish, didn't it? Maybe a bit curmudgeonly? Well, too bad. Look at the title bar of this blog, you ninny.

And now that I have managed to disparage both Jerry Jones and my readership, I bid you a fond farewell.

Aloha, Spicolli.

A day full of hope

April again, and a new baseball season is upon us. There are differences between April 2009 and Aprils of the recent past. I think there's reason to hope for a reasonably entertaining and satisfying season.

I can say this on April 5. Will I be saying the same thing on June 5?

So, what is different? Some minor stuff, and one critical, critical element. Allow me to elaborate.

I like this infield. A lot. The addition of ultra-prospect Elvis Andrus at SS, accompanied by Mike Young's move to 3B, and what should be a settled arrangement at 1B, solidifies things defensively. None of these guys are Tinker, Evers, or Chance, but, if the hype is to be believed, Andrus has a chance to star in his own poem and the whole bunch ought to improve over last year's butcher shop. The law of averages nearly ensures steadier fielding after last year's anti-clinic, right?

Offensively, the infield should be set for a pretty good, if not spectacular year. Young, Kinsler, Davis, and Saltalamacchia ought to produce some hits.

The outfield is OK, I think. I don't know that Andruw Jones has much left, but Rudy seems to think he's got plenty. I am still not sure if Rudy Jaramillio is Batting Cage Jesus or the most overrated dude to ever apply pine tar - if he's so great, how come this team hasn't hit with men in scoring position since the Clinton Administration? Either way, he seems to get some respect around the league, and if he says take a look at Jones, we probably ought to wait until at least early May before we run him out of town.

The biggest change, the biggest difference between today and the last 5 or 6 Opening Days is the state of the pitching staff. No, Walter Johnson and Cy Young have not returned from beyond the grave to don Ranger blue and red. We can look forward to mostly the same guys who have spared us to death over recent campaigns. However, for a change, we did not see a catastrophic injury in spring training. Shockingly, the Rangers start the season with the entire staff on the active roster.

This is a near-miracle. I mean, really. Not Parting of the Red Sea (how timely, yeah?), but pretty amazing.

Does this mean Millwood, Padilla, McCarthy, et al are going to throw strikes? No, that remains to be seen. But the fact they're available at the start of the season is beyond encouraging.

All in all, despite the 50-degree chill in the air (and the freeze warning for tonight - alas for my newly-planted snapdragons!), I would like to be fighting traffic on Collins today in an effort to catch me some Opening Day festivities!

Long overdue Mavericks rant

I have held my ire with the little Mavericks all season. I figured they just weren't worth the effort, and I still feel that way. However, last night's 93-76 debacle in San Antonio was so bad, so disheartening, so indicative of what this team has become, that I just can't help myself.

The Spurs were without Ginobilli and, at the last minute, Duncan. So, if you're the opposition, you look at the Spurs without two of their Big Three and you ask yourself, "Who do we have to stop?"

Need a minute to answer that one? Of course you don't! And neither does Rick Carlisle or anyone in a Maverick uni. You clamp down on Tony Parker and dare the spares to beat you. Elementary, right?

Except Parker goes off for 37. He could have had 50 with no problem except he started passing before shooting and got the spares some buckets.

If you're going to make any sort of run in the West, you HAVE to POUNCE on teams like the Spurs when they are depleted. You cannot get whacked by 17.

The window is closed. Everything the organization has done since Don Nelson left is open to second-guessing. It was a heck of a run, but the errors have all come home to roost. The Mavs had the championship won in Miami, then let it slip away. The emergency alarm rang the next year, when the Mavs had a super-human regular season then got swept by Golden State - that's when major changes should have been made. Nothing was done, and the fun has been pretty much over since then.

So, now what? I don't know. The options all stink, as this team doesn't have a draft pick worth a damn for the next few years. Free agency, esp the vaunted class of 2010? I suppose something can be done there, but what big-time free agent has signed here? I mean, I thought Cuban's largess with the players was supposed to have everyone lining up to be a Maverick. Sure doesn't seem like it's worked out that way, does it?

I am disappointed, disheartened, and disillusioned. I'm a Dallas sports fan, so I'm getting used to it.

Gay-Rod did 'roids with the Rangers?

I am shocked, shocked!, to hear Alex "Gay-Rod" Rodriguez apparently tested positive for steroid use back in 2003 when he was with the Rangers.

It sounds like the late 90's/early 00's Ranger clubhouse was the world's busiest pharmacy. Palmeiro, Ivan Rodriguez, Juan Gonzalez, and, of course, Canseco, and God-knows who else, were all apparently juicing like crazy, so it's not exactly the biggest surprise ever that Gay-Rod was following suit.

There's no way we're ever going to get a clear understanding of who was juicing and who wasn't in those days. It's sad to say, but every record and statistic for the ten-year period 1995-2005 needs to be questioned. And yet the American fan (and I include myself in this category) looks forward to spring training with optimism and enthusiasm.

It's enough to turn one into a cynic.

Daily YouTube: Cosby's Fiesta Bowl-winning TD

Here is the first play in Texas' march to the 2009 National Championship:

BCS National Champeenship

It's 7-7 at halftime, which means I have to stick with it. I have not got anywhere near enough sleep this week - I was hoping for a blowout!

My two grumpy, sleep-deprived observations:

1. I'm sorry, but marching bands are gay. The OU band's "Pinball Wizard" had me torn between laughter and vomit.

2. U of F's "When did you become a Gator" ad campaign is extremely silly.

And, just to complete my curmudgeonly misery, Crabtree's last-minute TD against Texas is the Pontiac Game Changing Performance of the Year. Dang it.

Texas 24 - Ohio State 21

I'm naming my next child Colt Quan Elkin.

Cowboys - Eagles

Romo just fumbled, leading to an Eagle TD return. At 34-3, I am ready to fire everybody. Coaches, players, Brad & Babe. Everyone.

What a choke. What a bunch of underachievers. I am disgusted. I am also turning the game off.

Another gloomy Monday in Sportsville

The Cowboys spit the bit like champs yesterday, blowing a 10 point lead in the last 8 minutes to lose to the Steelers 20-13.

What a life-force drainer this one was.

While the defense seems to improve with each passing game, special teams remain in the toilet, the offense swings wildly from great to horrible, Romo swings wildly from Jedi Master to erratic, and sideline chaos becomes more of a factor each week.

You can't ask more of a defense than what we witnessed for three and half quarters yesterday. Pressure? Yep. Outstanding coverage? Check. Hard-hitting, near-maniacal play from the linebackers? Got that too.

The only thing the defense lacked was the legs to finish. And its hard to blame them, as the offense and special teams put them in bad situation after bad situation.

The defense played well enough yesterday to win this game or any other you care to name.

While Tashard Choice turned in an exceptional performance in his first start, and exceeded everyone's expectations, we now have to question Marion Barber's toughness. I know that's easy to do from the warmth and cushiness of my couch, and I don't want to meet him in a parking lot after writing this, but EVERYONE expected him to play. What's up with that?

However, I don't know that it would have made any difference if Barber had been in there. Choice did fine, and I doubt Walter Payton could have overcome the outrageous mistakes made by Romo and the rest of the "skill" players.

Romo threw two of the worst looking interceptions you'll ever see, and the third (actually, the first sequentially) was a direct result of TO Owens giving up on a route. Witten made mistakes (where did that come from?), Williams made mistakes, Crayton was his usual non-factor, and it added up to a lot of missed opportunities.

Can someone tell me what the hell the coaches are coaching? I haven't seen such chaos on the field since Kent State (that was dark, no?). Romo looks like my son's 2nd grade teacher, directing confused children to their proper places. How the hell do two key players on opposite sides of the ball (Romo and Henry) try to call a 4th time-out in the first half? And what on Earth is up with 12 men on the field on a crucial third down? Wade seems to have lost complete control of this team. What is going on down there?

And a word about the special teams: DISASTER!

It's nut-cuttin' time now, friends. The Cowboys have to win out, and pray for help. This bunch has a good chance of becoming the most disappointing team in DFW sports history. Think for a moment about what that encompasses, and tell me I'm wrong.

The Mets' new field is still going to named "Citi"

After two massive government bailouts and a total crash in stock price, my former employers at Citigroup are still going forward with their plans to pay through the nose for naming rights to the Mets' new ballpark.

Citi Field is scheduled to replace venerable Shea next year, and Citigroup is reportedly paying upwards of $400 million to have their name on the marquee.

Does this sound like good use of our dough?