The Quran-burning idiots in Florida

I whole-heartedly support the right of every American human to make an idiot out of him- or her-self. It’s our God-given right to be stupid and to let everyone know it, if we’re so inclined. Hence t-shirts that say things like “Fart Loading” (complete with Windows-inspired progress bar), Wal-Mart, and UFC.

Most idiocy harms no one and reflects poorly only on the specific idiot or group of idiots. No harm, no foul. Just a giggle.

But, from time to time, a group of idiots transcend their own idiocy and do something so asinine, so mind-bogglingly stupid, that it rubs off on others around them. Sometimes the idiocy in question is so egregious, it reflects on society in general and actually threatens lives.

No, I’m not talking about American cultural exports like Coca-Cola, KFC, and Lady Gaga. Although the description applies to all of them too.

I am talking about the True Believers at the cynically named “Dove World Outreach Center” (three lies for the price of one) in Gainesville, FL. These are the imbeciles who plan to have themselves a little Quran-burning party on Saturday, which happens to be the 9th anniversary of That Day.

I am at a complete loss to understand the upside to this action. What good could possibly come of it? Burning holy books? How many things are wrong with that little three-word question?

This impossibly stupid, intolerant, and dangerous move has at least served to introduce us to grey Kaiser Wilhelm mustache and polyester sport coats of Rev Terry Jones, for all the good that does us. I hesitate to judge anyone who is being excoriated in the media, but it’s hard not to in this case. If a man is judged by his ideas, then Rev Jones needs to be on life support. Or, actually, not.

Who supports this idea? I guess Jones’ demographic does – white, deeply religious, big Southern dummies. I further guess some part of the people who oppose the “Ground Zero Mosque” like this idea too, although I think the argument about the mosque has a lot more validity than this exercise in dip-shittery (by the way, I think the building of the Islamic center in lower Manhattan is a fantastic idea – what better way to show the tolerance and, really, the greatness of America?). Does any other human with a shred of intelligence think this is a good idea? What positives could possibly come of it?

The military, the Afghans, moderate Muslims, the Vatican, the Euros, everyone has come out against the idea in the strongest possible terms.

Does anyone think this is going to “teach radical Islam a lesson”? Muslim radicals will use this event, if it occurs, to inflame the uneducated masses in the Islamic world. There will be violence. There will be destruction, injuries, and deaths. Some of those deaths may well be Americans.

Rev Jones, are you prepared to have that blood on your hands? Because it will be.

Are radical and uneducated Muslims wrong to go on rampages because someone sets a match to some paper? Of course they are. I don’t support their rights to start violent protests. But I can’t do anything about their reaction. They are what they are. And what they are is predictable.

If we know what the reaction is going to be, why on Earth would we perform the first action? Do two wrongs make a right?

And aren’t we supposed to be the tolerant ones? Wasn’t this country founded on, among other things, the idea of freedom of religion? Hell, aren’t we better than this?

By preventing a mosque being built, or burning a stack of holy books, we are abandoning important, long-held principles. And we are playing into the hands of the radicals. We are doing their recruiting work for them. They want to portray the West in general, and the US in particular, as anti-Islam.

Say what you will about President Bush, but he did go out of his way to make it clear we were not at war with Islam, only with the radicals who perverted the religion for their own purposes. That message has been lost.

Now, with these actions, we virtually guarantee the world-wide perception that the US is, in fact, anti-Islam. Because that’s exactly what these actions are.

I’m embarrassed by these idiots. I have no wish to be lumped in with them. I have no desire for anyone to think they speak for me. I resent their hypocrisy, their attention-seeking, and their smug self-righteousness.

Hey Rev Jones, if you feel so strongly, if you REALLY want to make a statement, I’ve got a suggestion for you: Why don’t you fly your stack of Qurans over to Kandahar and set ‘em alight in the street there?

Media + Hurricanes = Stupid

Reading the coverage of Hurricane Earl this week has reinforced my long-held opinion that major media outlets devolve into barely literate baboons at the mere mention of the word “hurricane”.

Earl has been tracking well east of the N. Carolina shore for days now. It would have taken a significant deviation from projected course for the storm to do anything other than drop some rain and kick up some surf on the Outer Banks. Of course, deviations from the models happen all the time, and its always worth keeping an eye on what was, at one time, a Category 3 storm. But I had problems with the story being above the fold for four days.

Today, after Earl stuck to project course and (amazingly) dropped some rain and kicked up some surf on the Outer Banks (and, to be fair, caused some minor wind damage to power lines and flimsy structures like gas-station overhead), we see the predictable “we dodged a bullet” stories in the press.

We also, predictably, get pictures of every tiny bit of damage the legion of photographers in the area can dig up. The one that made me snort coffee thru my nose this morning was the photo above, of a guy paddling a kayak thru about 4 inches of water. The SUV splashing by with no apparent effort, right next to him, and the grass on the curb which is not under water, gives you an idea of how hard the photographer had to work to set this shot up. I can nearly guarantee Ed Earl (or whatever the kayakers name is) stared incredulously at the photog and said something like, “You want me to do what? There isn’t enough water there to float my kid’s tub toys!”

Stupid media. Stupid readers, some of whom, I guarantee, put their hands to their mouths and whispered , “Those poor people. The government needs to help them!”

Capital punishment - maybe not such a great idea

Saw a really striking graphic on MSNBC today about capital punishment in the US and the world. The part that really got me was the other countries cited as members of the Top 10 Executors.

I am appalled at the company we keep on this list. And I am equally aware we are the only "Western democracy" in the Top 10. I'm pretty sure this is a list we don't want to be on.

CIA "torture" - let's tap the brakes a bit

I am surprised, somewhat pleasantly so, to see a reasonable and thought-thru op/ed in the NYT this morning regarding the politically-motivated and wrong-headed recent moves by our esteemed Attorney General. As you no doubt know, AG Holder is mulling the idea of investigating, and perhaps bringing charges against, some in the CIA who conducted or sanctioned "aggressive interrogation tactics".

This is a travesty, and it frankly pisses me off.

We've reminded ourselves, in these virtual pages, of the national mindset back in late 2001 and early 2002. The US had just been attacked and was, rightly or wrongly, staggered and very angry. It sure seemed like more attacks were inevitable, and potentially much more devastating. Suicide bombers in Times Square, dirty bombs in Washington, or pneumonic plague loosed in the nation's transportation system were all seemingly viable, and each was written and talked about by very serious people as very serious threats.

Just imagine you're a CIA operative working in a musty walled compound in eastern Afghanistan in March of 2002. A couple of Delta Force guys drag in what appears to be a high-ranking member of AQ, and it's your job to get real facts, or "actionable intelligence", out of this character. Maybe the CIA's internal grapevine is starting to heat up with talk of plans for the next "spectacular", and everyone from your direct supervisor to the DCI to your Aunt Gertrude in Cleveland is counting on you to turn up the one tidbit that blows the operation open.

You've got this AQ honcho sitting in front of you, maybe with a few cuts and bruises courtesy of the Delta guys, but mostly intact. He's grinning his toothy grin at you, because he's been told that you represent a sick and decadent society which does not have the stomach to fight back. Between smug smiles, he hints about some really juicy info he's got stuck up in his melon, and boy, wouldn't you like to know what it is.

You think about your wife, your daughter, your mom and dad, your first grade teacher, the kids in that third grade class in Topeka who recently sent a pallet of Mach III razor blades and Pop-Tarts to your buddies in the 10th Mountain Division, everyone back home who may be at risk.

Do you use the non-lethal tools you have arranged beside you? The Taser, the jumper cables attached to the Delco Marine battery, the tilty wooden table (aka the "waterboard"), the noisy power drill, etc? Or do you let Toothy the Terrorist continue to smile and say nothing?

Answer that question honestly. Would you really have moral qualms? Really? If yes, perhaps you're a better human than I am. Inflicting some fear, pain, and confusion on my friend Toothy seems a lot more morally defensible than not getting the plans for "Operation Black Death" out of the guy who, for all I know, cooked up the plan from the start.

So, here we are, eight or so years down the road. Nothing of consequence has occurred here in the US. Sure, AQ and their franchisees have spun up the scoreboard a bit in places like the UK, Spain, Bali, Iraq, Saudi, etc, but those places are far, far away. It's been quiet here. Why? Maybe its because AQ isn't as tough as we thought they were. Maybe it's because the 101st and the 10th Mountain Division did their bit in Anaconda back in 2002. Maybe it's because our fictional CIA operative gave ol' Toothy the good news with the business end of the Taser, or read him his horoscope while he was strapped to the tilty table.

I don't know why things have been quiet domestically since Sept 2001, and neither do you.

My point is this: We were all scared, some more than others - sure, and we were all pretty sure we had reason to be scared, back in the early Aughts. Our elected government (please, please, please don't bring up Florida and the 2000 popular vote - that got settled by our system, like it or not) reacted to the most devastating attack ever successfully mounted against American civilians in an American city by taking the gloves all the way off. Our fictional CIA operative had official sanction from the highest levels to do whatever necessary to get his subject talking.

To go back now, from the safety and holier-than-thou high ground of 2009, and threaten to prosecute our fictional CIA operative and his real-life counterparts, is so mind-bogglingly cynical, so transparently political, and so unfair as to simply take my breath away.

Look, I am a fan of Obama. I voted for the guy and would do so again tomorrow. But that does not mean I give him and his team a free pass, especially when they try something as disingenuous as this little stunt.

Dang, I'm madder than I thought I was!

Goldman Sachs: Really smart or really crooked?

Interesting timing on a couple of Internet items the other day.

Numero uno is Goldman Sachs’ quarterly financial reporting. Apparently the second quarter of calendar 2009 was a veritable bonanza for the button-down types at Goldman. The largest remaining investment bank on Wall St reported revenue of $13.8 billion and profit of $2.7 billion. This represents a staggering 65% jump in profit over the same quarter in 2008.

The MSNBC article linked above cites all sorts of nice, up-and-up reasons why Goldman continues to rack up the bucks despite the current environment of gloom and doom. Gutsy trading strategies and sharp employees are cited, along with billions in taxpayer money (all now repaid) and the death of most of the competition all contribute, according to the article.

Maybe so. But maybe there’s more to it.

Twenty-first century gadfly, and walking advertisement for the benefits of routine dental checkups, Matt Taibbi is back in the pages of Rolling Stone, administering a smack-down on Goldman specifically, and investment banks in general. He levies the charge that Goldman has been behind, or at least right in the middle of, every major market manipulation since the 1930s. More recently, Taibbi tells us, Goldman has engineered the DotCom bubble, the housing bubble, and last summer’s commodities (read: gasoline) bubble.

In the past, I have rejected Taibbi’s rants as paranoid, conspiracy-theory baloney. In retrospect, I’m not so sure I wasn’t wrong about that, at least in part. The guy does his research. Yeah, he makes some leaps that I have trouble following, but he makes it sound plausible.

I had, in fact, only been somewhat taken by The Great American Bubble Machine (the Goldman piece), right up until Goldman reported results the other day.

Co-inky-dink? I dunno. Read Taibbi’s article and you decide.

What does a trillion dollars look like?

No, the picture below isn't it. This is a mere $100 million.

If you want to see $1 trillion, in packets of $100 bills, go look here.

And, just for shock value, here you will see the $11 trillion US debt.

Um, holy crap?

Swine flu funny

Sorry, I mean "H1N1", although I have also heard "Farmageddon" or "Aporkalypse"...

Keith Olbermann is my hero

I have been an Olbermann fan since the days of the Big Show on ESPN. While I disagree with a lot of his politics, I really like the guy to this day.

Now, he has taken another step up in my estimation.

After Sean "Windbag" Hannity said on his TV show that he'd undergo waterboarding "for charity", Olbermann has stepped in and offered $1,000 per second that Hannity can withstand the treatment.

No response from Hannity.

Everything I have ever read from people who have been subjected to waterboarding tells me that, regardless of your training, experience, general level-headedness, or toughness, it is terrifying. Your body believes you are drowning. I believe it is torture. Whether it's effective or not, I really have no idea.

I would LOVE to see Hannity do this. Put up or shut up, you blowhard. Hell, I'm in for $10 per second (I don't make the coin Olbermann does) to the charity of Hannity's choice.

C'mon, Sean, Put your kiester where you mouth is!

A city official with a sense of humor

The natives are restless in San Francisco, where efforts to expand the use of medical marijuana are causing all sorts of furor.

I have gone on record many times in my support of the legalization of marijuana, and just about everything else, so I won't go off on rant here. Instead, I will point you to a story on the San Francisco Chronicle's site, where you will find the following gem:

"The mayor will have to hash this out with public health officials," press secretary Nathan Ballard said. "It's the mayor's job to weed out bad legislation. And to be blunt, this sounds pretty bad."

This, my friends, is genius!

Daily YouTube: Random video from Sept 2001

I don't know about you, but I think America was at its best back in Sept 2001. A great deal has happened since then, but I think its important to look back and remember how we all felt then.

NOW (more than ever)!

Do you feel that the shine has come off our Rock Star Pres?

I got the answer:



Nuff Said!

Detroit

A couple of tidbits regarding the disaster known as Detroit MI have caught my eye lately.

That Detroit has been in decline for decades is certainly not news. Back in the 80s, an effort at urban renewal, centered around Renaissance Center, bloomed in the downtown area, but nothing much came of it. Years of job losses, political corruption, mismanagement, and general decay have left the city an urban wasteland of epic proportions. While there are still affluent suburbs aplenty, the core is a disaster unequaled in the developed world.

A series of photos of abandoned buildings of all sorts was published recently published as a Time magazine photo essay. The only clean-up done in some of Detroit's once-stately hotels and other buildings has been done by looters. The pictures, taken by a couple of French photographers, are haunting.

But, out of this blight, something is emerging. A small group of artists have bought badly distressed housing for ridiculously low prices ($100 for a house and land?) and are renovating, wiring up to solar power, planting gardens, and making something out of less than nothing. It's reminiscent of the reemergence of Manhattan's SoHo and TriBeCa neighborhoods, where the avant garde began squatting in abandoned warehouses and factories and, over years and years, turned blight into a trendy, popping place-to-be.

We've seen similar efforts right here in Dallas - the West End, Deep Ellum, and Exposition Park spring to mind immediately. The degree of success has varied, and the long-term viability of all these areas is still somewhat in question, but the attempts have been made.

Will the same thing happen in Detroit? Hard to say. There are obvious, huge distinctions - as bad as SoHo was, it was still mere blocks from Midtown, which never decayed to the same extent. The devastation in Detroit may well be too far along to reverse.

Nevertheless, it is fascinating to watch an area die out, and few hardy souls attempt to bring it back.

The fall of Citigroup, continued

More on (pun intended) the Citigroup debacle in a recent Economist article.

The gist of this one is that Citi was too big to manage. Anyone who has worked there could tell you that much. Whilst inside the belly of the beast in the early 2000s, it occurred to many of us that there was no way anyone could keep track of the behemoth wrought by Weill. With 300,000+ employees, operations scattered literally to the four corners of the world, languages, cultures, banking laws, customs, technologies, currencies, and controls of every stripe imaginable, Citi defied the imagination.

I went for months at a time without talking to anyone outside the company. Between our cash processing at Citibank in Delaware, our umpteen acquired portfolios in probably 20 states, our IT in NYC, our foreign operations in Canada and Puerto Rico, our nun-with-a-ruler auditors crawling over the entire operation like ants, and management EVERYwhere, I spent days, weeks, months on interminable conference calls, fighting for my little projects, fending off intrusive managers looking to validate their positions, auditors more concerned with methods than results, and an aversion to risk at all levels which bordered on psychosis.

We got very little actually done, but burned calories and brain cells at suicidal rates. Any minor success was often chalked up to the "even a broken clock is right twice a day" theory, rather than any talent or skill on the part of the victorious party.

It's no surprise to me that all sorts of illegal and bone-headed shenanigans were going on in the brokerage and mortgage lending areas. I submit that these are only the illegal and bone-headed shenanigans which came to light. Many more were occurring in less-sensitive areas or by crooks or bone-heads less ambitious or more skilled in covering their tracks.

Morale inside Citigroup, at least amongst those I worked with directly, was horrible and beaten down back in the days when Citi was a money factory. Now that the red ink is flowing in Zambezian torrents and the axe is swinging indiscriminately, I'm sure it's as much fun as a Dickens-era garment factory.

Thank the sweet, clean Maker of Us All I got out of there when I did!

I take no pleasure in this...

When I was at Citigroup (I left in 2003), we lamented the fact we could not get our stock price over $50 no matter what we did. In those days, the place was absolutely printing money, and Sandy Weill looked like the smartest man in the history of money.

Six years later, we get this (click the image if your eyes are as bad as mine)...



The Citi Never Sleeps, says the slogan. I bet they're losing some sleep these days.

How is this even possible? I am an optimist, but something like this shakes you to the core.

Daily YouTube: Cosby's Fiesta Bowl-winning TD

Here is the first play in Texas' march to the 2009 National Championship:

BCS National Champeenship

It's 7-7 at halftime, which means I have to stick with it. I have not got anywhere near enough sleep this week - I was hoping for a blowout!

My two grumpy, sleep-deprived observations:

1. I'm sorry, but marching bands are gay. The OU band's "Pinball Wizard" had me torn between laughter and vomit.

2. U of F's "When did you become a Gator" ad campaign is extremely silly.

And, just to complete my curmudgeonly misery, Crabtree's last-minute TD against Texas is the Pontiac Game Changing Performance of the Year. Dang it.

Why Isn't Matt in Colfax?

I stumbled upon this and I have smiled and smiled and smiled and smiled for so long my lips fell off (but they landed in one of the dogs' food bowls which made him smile and smile and smile).

This is how we should all be spending our time.

Thank Goat for Matt!

The Mets' new field is still going to named "Citi"

After two massive government bailouts and a total crash in stock price, my former employers at Citigroup are still going forward with their plans to pay through the nose for naming rights to the Mets' new ballpark.

Citi Field is scheduled to replace venerable Shea next year, and Citigroup is reportedly paying upwards of $400 million to have their name on the marquee.

Does this sound like good use of our dough?

Saturday morning scattershooting

Scattershooting while wondering whatever happened to Tony "Thrill" Hill...

- Some poor bastard got "Cincinnatti Who'd" at a Wal-Mart in Valley Stream NY yesterday. Then the crowd got pissed because the store was closing. Suburban NY is not for the faint-of-heart, man.

- Speaking of sorry, sorry humans, those a-holes who shot up Mumbai seem to have finally lost. I guess blasting away in the sub-continent allows Muslim fanatics to check a lot of items off their lists: Jews? Check. Western tourists? Check. Cow-worshipping heathens? Check. Sowing third-world panic? Check. What a bonanza, huh?

- Around the Horn of Africa, Somali pirates are still at it. Most recent victim is a chemical tanker. I just find it hard to believe these characters are as effective as they are. How do a bunch of frickin' goat herders in speedboats capture a super-tanker? Shouldn't the tanker driver be able to floor it and keep going? Boarding a ship in-motion on the high seas is not an easy thing to do, or so I've heard. If said ship is doing 15 knots and throwing up a massive wake, it seems like it would be pretty near impossible, wouldn't it. I guess the threat of an RPG through the windshield is somewhat intimidating, but those things aren't easy to fire from a bobby little speedboad either. Just don't get it.

- In yet more happy Africa news, Nigerians are killing each other yet again. This time it's over which religous-affiliated political party won elections. Good thing the world economy doesn't depend on Nigeria for oil or anything like that. Er, wait a minute...

- On a much lighter note, there's yet ANOTHER monster college football game in the Big 12 tonight. OU vs. Okie State has all sorts of possible ripple effects, and the entire south Plains will be tuned in, including usn's at the CIT Compound. This season, already the greatest ever, just keeps getting better.

Two pieces of SHOCKING news this Friday afternoon

Citigroup, once the biggest financial services firm on the planet, is circling the drain. It's stock, which had stalled around $50 for years, is now selling for $4.

Almost 300 cholera deaths have been reported in Zimbabwe. Is this the summer that finally turns sad Zimbabwe into the Ethiopia of the late 2000's?