Friday, February 27, 2009

Uncle Bob turns 85, throws a big ol' bash

Comrade Bob Mugabe is throwing a quarter-million-dollar party in honor of his own 85th birthday.

While his population starves, dies of cholera (over 3,000 at last count), and struggles with billion-percent inflation, Big Bob decides it's time to par-tay!

And why wouldn't he? After all, he freed Zimbabwe from the evils of minority rule, didn't he?

Forget that was 30 years ago. Forget that he started whacking his opposition and their families about 90 seconds after the transfer of power was complete. Forget that he has dismantled an agriculture system that once fed sub-Saharan Africa to the point where it's own population is dying in droves. Forget that he has presided over the decimation of what had been the best and brightest education, health care, and economic system in the region.

Forget all that heinous crap, because, you know, it's been fabricated by the Western media anyway. If Zimbabwe has any problems (not that it does, mind you), they are the results of Britain's attempts to recolonize.

Gee, I hope this doesn't sound too bitter...

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